Healing Friendships at the Well Community
by Joel Pulis
Community Pastor
the Well Community
Dallas, Texas
Do you know someone living with mental illness? Statistics support that you do. According to the US Surgeon General an estimated 26.2 percent of Americans ages 18 and older — about one in four adults — suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year. When applied to census estimates, this figure translates to almost 60 million people living with the effects of mental illness. Therefore, in someway or another, your community and your congregation are affected.
The lack of care for the mentally ill is a significant and growing crisis. For some time now, the state of Texas in particular has overlooked and under funded this concern, leaving us as the 49th out of 50 states in per capita spending on mental health services. Consequently some of the most vulnerable in our society are left to fend for themselves. With a debilitating brain disorder, the mentally ill are expected to secure adequate housing, maintain relationships with family, balance their finances, navigate the public system for resources, attend to their daily needs, utilize public transportation, remain compliant with their medications, and the list goes on.
In 2002, God led a team of us to plant a church called the Well Community among this population. We discovered a sizable population living in boarding homes and afflicted by severe and disabling mental illness in our immediate Dallas neighborhood of Oak Cliff. What makes the Well distinct is that most of our hundred or so community members suffer from some type of mental illness: depression, bipolar, or schizophrenia. It is to this group that we are called to serve.
Friendship
I sense that a new spirituality is being born in the church today, flowing from the wounded hearts of the weak and broken who are crying out for friendship. This friendship is also a source of healing for those who answer their cry. - Jean Vanier1
Our ministry among the mentally ill began simple enough. We visited local boarding homes in our neighborhood and got to know the residents. Soon a Sunday morning Bible study began meeting at a local church. The effort was not unlike most traditional Sunday morning activities: coffee and donuts were shared, songs were sung, and the Bible was taught. However, what made the Well unique was that for the first time many of those participating had a place to belong.
To have severe mental illness in our culture is to be alienated, stigmatized, and often friendless. Unlike someone with cancer or a heart condition, a person diagnosed with severe mental illness can lose his personal identity and actually become the illness (e.g., a “schizophrenic” ). Due to the predominately negative cultural assumptions about these illnesses, those affected tend to form a negative social identity of themselves.
Therefore, as we began to understand this dynamic we responded to this unbiblical worldview with the Good News of Jesus. Our teachings focused on the love of God, His acceptance of us through Jesus, and our significance in Him. These were foundational truths, but they took on new meanings as we shared these precepts with our new acquaintances.
Beyond just the teaching focus of our ministry, friendship became foundational to our expanding work and mission. We began to intentionally structure our offerings to express this message of love, acceptance, and community. Our weekly service morphed into a Saturday evening gathering complete with a home-cooked fellowship meal. In 2006, we opened a group home that houses eight men who live together and support one another.
Three years ago we opened a Community Life Center—a “living room” of sorts—and point of outreach to the greater mental health community. The center offers a weekday program of support, counsel, and friendship. Currently approximately 75 clients per week participate in Bible studies, mental health support groups, life skills education, vocational projects, and a free lunch program. Additionally, clients are helped with case management needs (e.g., representative payee services, finding and maintaining a residence, guidance in navigating the public mental health system). These and other examples represent our efforts in befriending those with mental illness.
Accompanying the friendship model is a focus on empowerment. As we have come to know and see the best in those we love, it follows that we pass on to them the power to share with others. Whereas in the early days very little ministry occurred peer-to-peer, it has been beautiful to see the growth of Community Members caring for one another. We now have biannual retreats where we purposely train and practice the Biblical “one anothers” – loving, listening, and serving.
Healing
Mental illness can rob a person of peace of mind, relationships, and sense of purpose in life. But mental illness is not a life sentence, and biomedical, psychological, and spiritual treatments continue to improve… The church is in a unique position to combine all three. – Emily Dosset2
We are now entering our seventh year of ministry and the fruit of our labors is beginning to show. For example, Shelia (not her real name) came to the Well about four years ago. In the years before, she worked for companies such as Southwestern Bell and GEICO. However, her work history was interrupted by frequent periods of hospitalization and at one point she was arrested for vagrancy and spent some time in jail. After her last hospitalization, Sheila was discharged into a boarding home with little hope of getting her feet on the ground.
Through Sheila’s participation in the Well’s programs and a close relationship with one of our volunteers, she was able to once again develop her confidence and make the transition to independent living. For the past three years Sheila has been living in her own apartment and for the past year she has been working part-time in the front office of a local church.
While Shelia’s transformation has been dramatic, it is not unique. One of the joys of serving at the Well is to witness the miraculous changes in our people that result from the power of the gospel and the warmth of friendships.
the Well is committed to maintaining a church-based approach. Our motive is to share the love and life of Jesus. It has been fascinating how God has guided our approach to be compatible with various mental health best practices. Specifically, we have grounded our center programming in certain recovery principles and base weekday activities on the “clubhouse model.” We have found that active participants experience an increase in general mental health and well-being with associated decreases in hospital recidivism.
Our Calling
In this ministry of befriending people with mental health problems, there will be moments of sadness, joy, frustration, and uncertainty. But if the church does not offer such friendships, who will? …To do so is to offer them true healing—relief from suffering and a chance to maintain their connection with God and others despite the turbulent storms they must endure. – John Swinton3
In Matthew 9:36 we read of Jesus’ compassion for the people—those “harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” For me, this is an apt metaphor for the mentally ill—vulnerable, lost, and dependent. For these, Jesus’ heart broke. Therefore while we may be quick to accept Jesus’ healing ministry (Mt 9:35), we must remember that He has given his Church the same mandate and gift (Mt 10:1). Through a ministry of healing friendship, we can answer Jesus’ prayer and participate in His calling.
I’ll be the first to admit that not all of us are called to befriend the mentally ill. However, I am confident that as you open yourself to God’s ways, He will call you to your own ministry of healing friendship among the hurting wherever they may be found.
the Well Community is both a church - a worshipping and witnessing community - and a community development organization - providing resources to our neighbors in need. We believe strongly in the kingdom and the cup of cold water (Matthew 10:7-8, 42).
OUR MISSION:
OUR STRATEGY: We focus on the core issues related to mental illness – isolation, hopelessness, poverty - by providing our Community Members with a healthy environment and access to needed resources.
OUR PHILOSOPHY: We do not have clients or consumers of our services - we have Community Members. We believe that together we can become more of whom God made us to be, both individually and collectively.
OUR PROGRAMS: Check our website for specific information
ADDITIONAL INFORMATION:
- “You Are Welcome Here” by Steve Blow (Baylor Line, Spring 2008)
- Mission Serve offering video
- the Well :: Community Update (Spring 2008)
- “Filling Hearts at the Well” (CliffDweller, December 2006)
- “He gives the mentally ill a place to pray and belong” (People Magazine, February 26, 2007)
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1 As quoted in the Verse and Voice email, http://www.Sojo.net, June 2, 2008.
2 Emily C. Dossett. “A Place of Peace and Rest”, Sojourners Magazine, November-December 2002 (Vol. 31, No. 6, pp. 36-42).
3 John Swinton, “Healing Presence,” Christian Reflection (Vol. 14, pp. 68-75)